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On Self-Consciousness 22 May, 2007

Posted by monopod in Observations, Self-Absorption.

I think that in the end we are both lesser and greater than what we see in ourselves and what others see in us. Everywhere there are words I wish were mine; intellect I could only ever aspire to; beauty I covet; strength I envy. And perversely, the words, intellect, beauty, strength I do have – whatever their worth – I deprecate. Of course, the only logical outcome of this is that the more I try to fashion myself into the person in my head, the more I disappear. And so it happens that the words I have painstakingly crafted to reflect the person I think I should be are eventually the most stilted version of me I can imagine, and the words with which I am ultimately happiest are the ones in which I have forgotten to pretend.



1. Gond - 23 May, 2007

So true, and so well said.

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